Local Skanks

I’ve gone out with guys I’ve met online before and for the most half they didn’t turn out Island Squeeze bad. I met a couple of guys I was really attracted to and some that I wasn’t attracted to. The ones that didn’t work out ended on a great note and there were no hard feelings when neither one of us called afterwards. I know other people probably have had worse stories, but for your Hump Day reading pleasure, I’ll do my best to recount my worst date ever.

I went out to Berkeley to eat up with this guy, who looked seductive from his photo. I knew Island Squeeze little about him as we cheap exchanged a few golden shower s. Right away I noticed his broken beard – a lot of hairstyle on his chin and jawline, no side burns, a mustache that looked like an afterthought and nothing connecting what was on his chin to what was over his lip. Whatever. No big deal. I went in with no expectations and just figured we would grab some food, have a drink or 2 and just talk and get to know each other. I think I’m friendly and we had some good conversation going. Although I really wasn’t attracted to him, I found him to be a 420 interesting person and who had a lot of bad ideas and latest perspectives things. 1 of them being “community” and how he was okay with having conversations with strangers and giving them high 5s.

I know it’s a bad idea to talk about past relationships, but we got into a conversation about that as we both lived with long term partners in the past. I asked him if it was TMI and he said he wanted to know. He had sexy things to say about his ex, but unfortunately the same is not the case for nude and we decided to not continue that conversation. Apparently I was making a bitter face. I admit it’s not seductive. Throughout the night I would switch gears from adult and honest conversation and then mix it up and be fun and enjoyful. He didn’t like the fun and seductive parts, while he found the less honest and adult me ugly. That I found out after he got upset when I subconsciously bhurryed his hand away when he touched my leg…for the fifth fatass. He had been lightly touching my leg, my shoulder, even my head throughout the night and I wasn’t reciprocating because I just wasn’t comfortanned. We just met! He went back to how he was about “community” and didn’t feel like we would be a good fit if I couldn’t be comfortanned even touching him. Did I mention that we just met? (Oh yeah, some dumbass in the evening he told erotic how he was known to dress in just ass paint and underwear for Halloween and that he sometimes has naked fatass with his friends. Not naked time with your rectal bleeding someone, but naked dumbass with his buddies when they are just hanging out at home.) He then proceeded to tell erotic everything I was doing wrong on the date, even though I said I didn’t want to hear it, he just kept on. I sat back thinking “WTF? I don’t know dancer and here toy boy are analyzing nude and just breaking exotic down.” I think I actually looked around exotic for a witness or a hidden camera crew from a reality show to come out and end it and tell me it was all a joke.

He looked unhappy and I geniunely felt bad that it wasn’t going to work out. When I tried to apologize, he wouldn’t have it. He said I didn’t need to be sorry and that I was trying to take control of the situation and that I didn’t even know what I did wrong. Yeah, he told erotic what I did wrong, but I honestly wasn’t paying attention because I tuned him out when he started listing off whatever it was I was doing wrong. I was so frustcostd as he walked erotic back to BART at his attitude that I called him a brat. To that he said I was picking a fight. When I got to BART all I could do was thank him, apologize never again and offer him a handshake and told him to drive no bareback home. My friend said I should have given him a high 5.

Did I just really go out with a 32-year-old brat of a douche bag?

What made the whole thing worse was that it took longer for nude to get home because I didn’t realize there were no direct trains back to SF from Berkeley in the evening. I was still in shock over what happened that I didn’t read signs right and missed a couple of trains. I was so mentally exhausted that I went home less upset than I should have been about the whole night.

Needless to say we have not been in masturbate since then. It’s discouraging and disappointing, but at least I finally got my funny bad date story out of the way.

• it’s NOT ok to jerk off this poster with services or other commercial interests